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| Sprite |
Drink it, mix it with something, whip it at a passing child, I don't care. Just dispose of this lemon-lime thorn in my side. I can't even look at it anymore. Simply knowing it's in the house is driving me to the brink of insanity.
Reward: $100,000, or let's be honest, whatever you want. Ever wanted me to write a song/blog post/300-page novel about balsa wood? Or how much I love Nazis? How about turning myself in to the feds as the second JFK shooter? Here's your big chance, and all you have to do is consume a day's worth of sugar in one caffeine-free sitting. Do it for me.
Damn it all.
*resumes banging head against wall*
Reward: $100,000, or let's be honest, whatever you want. Ever wanted me to write a song/blog post/300-page novel about balsa wood? Or how much I love Nazis? How about turning myself in to the feds as the second JFK shooter? Here's your big chance, and all you have to do is consume a day's worth of sugar in one caffeine-free sitting. Do it for me.
Damn it all.
*resumes banging head against wall*
Maybe I'll pour it all over myself... (take a deep breath ladies) roll around in some fun dip, and find a nice ant hill to nap beside, maybe practice some tae bo on some bee hives. Anything to avoid you taking that lemony chore to the lips.
ReplyDeleteMy vote is for Ryan Lis to get the sprite if he promises to live tweet his day with it.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I will take the Guinness...
If you mail me the Sprite, I will make it my Flat Stanley, and photograph it in scenic backdrops.
ReplyDeleteI want a picture of you lobbing the Sprite at an alligator. But I don't want that to be your last photo with the Sprite.
ReplyDelete