It's Not Always Darkest Before the Dawn. (Scientifically, It Just Doesn't Make Much Sense)

From: Rebecca Ferraro

To: Matt Kasznel

Subject: Whining

I have a topic to broach: the extreme overuse of the completely ridiculous phrase "It's always darkest just before the dawn." I've heard this in at least five songs and, of course, a Batman movie. I'm sure it's floating around out there in other regards as well. 

1) This phrase is incorrect. The night is actually lightest at twilight and prior to dawn. It's darkest in the middle of the night.

2) It's not even a clever phrase and it's irritating that everyone picks up on and utilizes it as if it's some majestic piece of poetry. It isn't.

3) If it's supposed to be a metaphor for difficult times in life, it's lame in that regard too. I rank it among my least favorite cliches, along with the closing doors and lighted tunnels and all the other nonsense.

From: Matt Kasznel

To: Rebecca Ferraro

It's alwayayayas darkest before THE DAAAAAWWWWWN. SHAKE IT OUT SHAKE IT OUT, OH WAY-UH. How could you burn the lyrical choices of dearest Flo Welch?

Anyway, I'm not a huge fan of the phrase, but then again, the grass isn't always literally greener on the other side, and it's impossible to count chickens before they hatch because you don't have chickens for years after the chicks mature - plus, the answer should always be "zero," because fried eggs are soooooooo good.

There has to be a better phrase for "things are always most difficult before becoming wonderful." Which, in and of itself, is kind of a dumb idea. If things are at their worst, then by definition, they can only get better, right?

How about:
1. It's always Good Friday before Easter Sunday
2. There's always paid programming on before the morning news.
3. There are always disgusting, dried-out breakfast sandwiches that have been sitting under a heat lamp too long in the office cafe before they are replaced by marginally better lunch options.

From: Rebecca

To: Matt

Well, not only Florence but also City & Colour, Rise Against, Batman, numerous other movies... like come on people, it's a STUPID phrase. Surely there is no need to keep using it.

Ooo, okay, how about "Not being prepared for your meeting/interview/exam is like not being prepared for rain in Pittsburgh: it's inevitable, so why not avoid the storm?"

This brings me to another. "Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass. It's about learning to dance in the rain." Swell. I have done this. I enjoy the sentiment. But when I did it at Garden one night, Ronnie and Dylan were worried I was going to get struck by lightning. A valid concern. Should we really be encouraging that?

Also, the phrase "Live, laugh, love" is on a million posters, frames, wine glasses, and what have you. Not particularly inspiring. "Oh, I am brooding and melancholy today but this coffee mug told me to lighten up so I totally should,” said no one ever. 

From: Matt

To: Rebecca

The whole idea of running out in the rain by your own volition is bonkers. Sure, if you're already outside, and it's already raining, and you're already wet, then yeah, get used to it. It's water, after all.

But if I'm waiting for the storm to pass, I'm generally indoors. I'm generally already comfortable. I'm probably enjoying a nice glass of bourbon and listening to a podcast or watching Steven Seagal: Lawman or something. If I wanted to get in touch with my "spontaneous, free-spirited" side, I'd watch Free Willy, mostly because of what "Free Willy" means in England. Point being, I can experience all the "freedom" I want without getting pneumonia.

Can we take a minute to discuss motivational posters in general? I'm struggling to come up with one scenario where a poster, coffee mug, meme, or motivational speaker moved the needle for me. I can think of several occasions where I listened to a motivational speaker and though, "Oh, he/she is really good. I'll bet a lot of people enjoyed him/her." But I never get inspired myself.

Maybe I'm overly cynical, because the moment I hear a phrase or read anything that starts to sound remotely inspirational, I shut it down. It enters "Cliche Zone." Almost as if I don't want to think that I'm "the type of person" that draws motivation from that sort of thing. Which is extremely judgmental, but whatever.

To: Matt

From: Rebecca

If we're being honest, I zone out a lot during motivational anything. I motivate myself. 

The posters are absurd too. It's always like...a scrunchy-faced kitten trying to claw its way up a mountain and some slogan reminding you that if you believe it, you'll land among the stars or some crap. When I have a classroom, my posters are going to say "You should want to do well, so do well" and "I read for fun. Try it and you too will struggle for years to find a job that allows you to keep that hobby and pass it off to others". 

Speaking of books and motivation, the other day I saw this thing in my news feed from Time or Reader's Digest about the top 8 books you need to read right now. I excitedly clicked on the link only to learn it was a list of stupid self-help and motivational books. What a tremendous disappointment for me. Talk about a beautiful letdown. Bribe me with books--the girl who could build a house out of the tomes she has chilling in her room-- and then make it all about how to better myself. Who cares? -_-